Returning vs. Staying

Last night was the North Hall Eastside pass down. At this event the current RA's and Leadership positions pass down to the future RA's and leadership positions. It is an awesome time of reflection and tips for the future. Each unit has crazy things to pass down and most things are tired to memories. This event is just such a reminder of what a family I have in these women. I said to two different people before the event that I wasn't going to cry. Cute Paige... real cute. I cried. A lot. But it was good. I was just reflecting on how much we had been through as a staff and how blessed I am by each of those women in that room. I am so thankful for having served along the RA's and leadership of this year and I am so excited and blessed to be able to return to Eastside and serve with some of the same and a lot of new ladies.

I purposely want to use the word RETURN. I don't want to use the word stay. I think of staying as a word that has a complacency connotation tagged on to it. Kinda like "nah Ill just stay here." I think those words are said out of comfort. Staying with what is familiar and staying with what is safe and becoming complacent. I am not returning to Eastside just because I want to "stay". I am returning because I feel passionate about Eastside and the journy that happens in the life of a freshmen in college. I am returning because I believe that God has equipped me and will continue to equip me to love those around me in this place and to do the job to the best of my ability. I am not returning because it is the safe option. I have no idea what next year will being. I will have a new staff. I will have new residents. But yet still I want to return. I want to return to the community that has given so much to me and I want to continue to give back.  I also think that returning is a more biblical term than staying. I think of how Christ will one day return for His love (us). On a smaller scale I want to return because I love Eastside and I love the freshmen experience. So I am not staying... I am going to return next year.

Faithfulness

At the end of a semester it is hard for me to not reflect on all the ways that God has been faithful in this season.  This year...like all years has had numerous up's and downs. However, through it all I can see how God is working. As an RA I knew the added responsibly would have its perks and its downfalls. These two semesters were the first two semesters in college that I have not been in a dating relationship. I have felt alone. I have felt burnt out. I have cried. I have nearly thrown up from crying. I have been hurt, offended, discouraged, burdened, lost and confused. I have also known community in a whole new way. I have been encouraged and poured into as well as having the opportunity to pour into others. I have had beautiful quiet times with the Lord. I have grown, been challenged, and cared for. I have laughed...oh I have laughed. I have made new friendships that have surprised me in many ways and I have strengthened and deepended relationships that already existed. I have also felt equipped, loved, and smart.

 Most importantly God has been all over it.

The growing that I have done (aka God has done) this year has been crazyness. I can already see ways that the Lord prepared me to serve as an RA during this season and ways that He is continuing to work on my heart and my love to continue in this role.

He has placed just the right people in my life for just the right moments to challenge me or hug me...or pull me away from other things. I am so blessed by the gifts of friendship this year and the ways that I have learned from those relationships.

God has placed new passions on my heart. I have such a passion for freshmen women and the journey that takes place in the freshmen year of college. I have a passion for Christian community. I have a new found love for the church and what the church was intended to be. I find new joy in my major and learning about communication and how I can be better, or use it to glorify God.

Now I want to talk about boys. My first two semesters of college I was in two different serious or extremely serious relationships. In these recent semesters I have processed and grieved those ended relationships in a very real way (God worked in a crazy way in that. Maybe I'll save that for another post...or just come talk to me about it). This year I have not dated anybody. Has there been the possibility? Yes. has the Lord walked with me through those situations and relationships? Yes. SOOOO faithfully. Have I gotten hurt? Yes. But ultimately He has protected me from a lot more hurt from being in relationships for the wrong reason or with the wrong person etc. Without a boyfriend I have felt lonely and there have been many moments where I have wished I had one...but God has met me in new ways. I have learned ways that God can fill those longings and I have realized that my maker knows a lot more about what I need than what I think I need.

He has been faithful. In my studies...in my job...in my family...in my relationships...on this campus.

How has God been faithful in your life during this season? 

Breathe

Today. Pause. Breathe.
It may seem like we are all on a steep slide slipping down to the end of the year. Am I right? If I think about it too deeply that is exactly how I feel.  Is that what God is calling me to feel right now? Is that how I should be looking at these last days of my Sophomore year? Should I be looking at these classes and these learning opportunities as a means to an end, or another thing to cross off my list? I kinda don't think so...

Last night as a staff my RD talked about seeing the bigger story in the midst of the crazyness in the last few weeks. These finals, and papers, and tests are so small in the grand scheme of things.

Don't let it take your focus of Him or the reason that He brought you here. Maybe you could let it have a sentence in the whole story. But not much more.

This semester I have written more research papers than ever before. I have become a pro at finding credible sources and writing lit reviews etc. I could totally flip out and whine and tell all my friends about how much work they require or I can look at the bigger story and how they fit into that. I've been thinking a lot about what I have learned in the process of writing these papers. I am a much more confident research paper writer. I researched some really interesting things that I am continuing to interact with everyday...like social media usage in advertising, and humor used in small group settings, and my personal leadership. I learned a lot and for that I am thankful. I think those papers will play into my life in a unique way in the years to come.

How have the things you are learning/have learned this semester play into the bigger story? 
How are you going to let these few weeks be written in the story that is your life? 

I want to leave you with a prayer that my RD gave us by Ted Loder:

I Need to Breathe Deeply

Eternal Friend,
Grant me an ease
To breathe deeply of this moment
This light,
This miracle of now.
Beneath the din and fury of great movements and harsh news
And urgent cries, make me attentive still
To good news,
To small occasions,
And the grace of what is possible
For me to be,
To do,
To give,
To recieve,
That I may miss neither my neighbor's gift,
Nor my enemy's need..

Guest Blogger- Kayla Johnson

I am soooo pleased to introduce you to a wonderful friend and role model in my life. Kayla was my RA my freshmen year. Despite her extremely weird profile picture when I first friend requested her (her hair was all in front of her face and it was just silly)....she is really awesome. Kayla is passionate about her relationship with the Lord and is extremely loving and caring of others. Kayla is going to be graduating in just a few days so I asked her to share some thoughts with you. Kayla blogs here! Thank you so much Kayla for the way that you have invested in my life and in so many other lives here at IWU.

        So per the request of a Ms. Paige Oler, I am guest blogging to share some thoughts with you. I don’t really know how to get this started so i’ll just awkwardly transition into my thought life now... Through my years here at school I think God has taught me a lot about who He is and His call for my life. But even as a graduating Senior, I don’t know exactly what I’ll be doing with the gifts and passions God has revealed to me. Many times I get a little down on myself and feel like at this point I should know EXACTLY what God has for my life. I should know the 10 year plan of what I will be doing, how I will be making money, who I will be marrying, when I will be a mother, how I will pay off my school debt.... you know.. all those questions. But I don’t. And I don’t think this is a lack of my abilities to plan (though I’m not an awesome planner). God’s just not ready to reveal all of those specifics to me right now. I know I’ll be living in Marion, working at a bookstore and learning how to farm in Upland, being involved in the Marion community gardens, and continuing to learn from the relationships I have built here through my church and school. But after that... i got nothin’
        For me, its an issue of control. I think the reason God hasn’t revealed the specifics of my life yet is because He knows that if I knew all of that stuff, I’d forget about Him. Not that I would drop my faith! But I wouldn’t seek Him as hard as I have been these past few months.
        One of my friends and mentors sent me a card the other day with a quote from MLK that really made me restructure the way I was approaching my future...
“This life, therefore, is not righteousness, but growth in righteousness; not health, but healing; not being, but becoming; not rest but exercise; we are not yet what he shall be, but we are growing toward it. The process is not yet finished, but it is going on. This is not the end, but it is the road. All is not yet gleam in glory but all is being purified.”
My prayer is that God would only reveal things to you on a “need to know” basis so that you will learn true dependence on Him as the author of your story. Trust Him to write out your life and live freely that He will write a good one. Living in this trust daily with a posture of response to all that He has for you in that day will give you a rich since of freedom. Life is not an end goal, but a process of seeking and glorifying God on the journey.

Let’s be realistic

Tis’ the season of group projects, huge papers, and exams. Right around now we have tons of last big projects before our finals. It can be intense. We find ourselves whining about meeting with groups and finding time to get everything done. But really where does the whining and complaining get us? Nowhere. Listen to this….projects, papers, and presentations are not the end of the world, or even close for that matter. Take everything in stride. Do not let these things create stress in your life. It is your choice. It can be another thing to cross off your list or it can be something that holds you down and makes you want to cry. 

It can be a lot of work but seriously just do your best. Use your time wisely. If you feel bogged down look at the ways in which you are spending your time. What are some things that can change so that you can get another thing crossed off that list of “to-do’s?” Maybe it’s getting up an hour before your classes to read or work on a project for 30 minutes. Maybe you should practice saying “no” to things that you want to do but you could be productive if you didn’t do it. Again, breathe in…and breathe out… it will all get done. Just take one step at a time.

This weekend is Easter break and if you are like me you probably have plans to get some of that work done during this weekend. I want to challenge you to be realistic with your time and the amount of things you will get done. I know that there have been many weekends where I have gone home and thought that I was going to get lots of work done and all I arrived and all I wanted to do was sleep and hang out with my family. Then I come back to school and I am upset with myself for not getting anything done and I end up kicking myself. It might be helpful to schedule out your break. Pick certain times that you are going to block off to do homework. Pick certain times that you are going to intentional about spending with family and friends. Then, tell your family those times. I know that my mom always appreciates when I tell her what times I plan to do homework, that way she can plan to do something else (other than hanging out with me) during that time. I know that some of my favorite times of breaks have been when I have taken my homework to my favorite coffee shop, settled in and worked. Sometimes my mom brings a book and comes with and just having her sitting with me helps remind me that I am home. It just really helps me to be realistic. If I know that I will not get any work done then I say that and I am realistic with myself. It helps me to come back to school feeling like I accomplished whatever I set out to do.  

Here’s another challenge. Take time this week to be quiet and alone. Take time to reflect and to focus on the cross. Easter is kind of a big deal to our faith and for some reason we do not spend nearly enough time focused on it. With that said I will leave you with some of the lyrics to Before The Throne Of God Above, which we sang in chapel today and has some serious Easter talk.

“Because the sinless Savior died, 
My sinful soul is counted free; 
For God the just is satisfied
To look on Him and pardon me
To look on Him and pardon me

Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Praise the One, 
Risen Son of God! 

Behold Him there, the Risen Lamb
My perfect, spotless righteousness, 
The great unchangeable I am, 
The King of glory and of grace! 

One with Himself I cannot die
My soul is purchased by His blood
My life is hid with Christ on high, 
With Christ, my Savior and my God”

Kony 2012 and The Hunger Games

These topics are pretty big these days. Kony 2012, and The Hunger Games. I think I have been avoiding blogging about them because I think they are both just really big topics to address. But the avoiding is over. Disclaimer: these are my thoughts and feelings; by no means do I think I know everything or that I have any answers. 

With that being said here are my thoughts on Kony 2012. Wow. What a huge campaign. What a great example of how powerful social media can be. As a Public Relations major I have been impressed and really interested in how they have handled everything. As a person who has been to Africa a few times, I have a passion for Africa, and this hit my heart pretty hard. I know people from Uganda and it was not the first time I had heard of The Invisible Children Organization. I was shocked by how many people reposted the video and how many conversations I had about it in the week following the videos explosion. The thing that scared me the most was the bandwagon effect. It seemed to me that within a matter of minutes people were watching the video and reposting it or sharing it with friends. My guess is that these people did little to no research on the topic itself. As a person in college, and as a Christian, I think it is my role to be a smart consumer of the media that I intake and the media that I put out or repost. There was no way that I was going to repost that video right after watching it. My heart was hurting. I was confused. I didn’t fully understand the topic and I knew I needed to read more if I was going to support the movement or not. So, my challenge to you blog friends is to form your own opinion. Be cautious when you decide to support something like this. Do your research. Don’t repost it because all your friends are, don’t repost it because it will make you look like a better Christian; do not repost it because you want to “fix” Africa. Be able to have an informed decision and not just say “what a cool video.” 

Here are some articles that I have read to become more informed on the topic. Read these, or don’t, feel free to read others. It’s not hard to find them.

http://www.ploughshares.ca/content/kony-2012-now-we-have-your-attention

http://s3.amazonaws.com/www.invisiblechildren.com/critiques.html

 http://www.theatlantic.com/international/archive/2012/03/the-white-savior-industrial-complex/254843/#

 http://www.theatlantic.com/international/archive/2012/03/solving-war-crimes-with-wristbands-the-arrogance-of-kony-2012/254193/

Micah 6:8

Now, The Hunger Games. 

I went and saw The Hunger Games on opening weekend. I went in feeling very skeptical. I knew the plot had children killing children and I was confused as to how that could be entertaining. I saw it in Bluffton, Ohio for $3 dollars in a theatre with one screen. Cute. Haha but that is besides the point. I loved the movie. I was hooked. There were two things that really stood out to me that took the “cool movie” to a much deeper level. 

 Here are the pretty ladies that I saw it with!

1.       The distribution of wealth.

My friend turned to me and said “it is so weird how its suppose to be a futuristic movie and some of the people are futuristic looking but the people in district 12 look so old fashioned.” To that I responded with “Yea, that’s how our world is today.”The distribution of the wealth today is unreal.  The percentage of people that have the money and power is crazy small. Just like the capital city in The Hunger Games. I eat like a queen in my college cafeteria while kids across the ocean and heck down the street are hoping that someone will toss a loaf of bread their way. This is real life. It’s how it is right now. Just like in The Hunger Games, yet, I don’t think people see it that way because they don’t want to. It sucks. Sometimes holding a mirror up to your life makes you want to close your eyes.

2.       Entertainment in our society.

One of the other things in the movie that slapped me in the face was the parallel to what we find out entertainment in. You might say “Paige, we are not entertained by watching kids kill other kids” which is true… to a degree. But what are we entertained by? As time goes on the things that are shown on TV and in movies gets more and more disgusting. We, and myself, included are entertained by reality TV. In all reality these shows have ruined lives or drastically changed them…and it is for our entertainment. We watch movies where people brutally kill each other. It might disturb us but to a degree we are entertained. It’s sick. I think it is getting worse. Again, it’s the whole mirror thing. The Hunger Games shows a drastic example….and it is something that I don’t think we want to face or except. 

After seeing the movie I had an awesome opportunity to meet with one of my professors and discuss it. Oh the perks of a small school. It was a great conversation and I encourage you to find others that want to talk about it with you. Of course, I am always willing and would love it. 

Those are my thoughts. Again, they are mine. I understand that. My goal is not to offend anyone or get anyone upset but I want to encourage you and spur you on to think more about both of these topics. I know that they might not be right but I hope that they make you think. I hope that they challenge you to think deeper about both of these headline topics.

With the end in sight…

It’s about that time. I had multiple professors’ talk about finals in my classes today. It is almost the end of the 2011-2012 school year. I don’t know about you but I am pretty sure the finish line is right around the corner. Pretty crazy. However, it is important that we do not get too far ahead of ourselves. We still have about 4 weeks left.

 In my unit devotions last night I challenged the girls to cast a vision for these next 4 weeks. How are you going to finish strong this year? What areas of your life do you want to be intentional in? Who do you want to be intentional with? What is your bucket list for the next 4 weeks? What are your goals? What is going to keep you from becoming complacent? What are you going to do in the next 4 weeks that will be worthy of “writing home about” or what will you one day tell your kids about this year of college? 

Trust me. As soon as we all leave to summer we will miss this time and these people sooner than we realize. So, my thought? Take advantage now. Answer the questions I just asked.

Take time right now. Get a post-it note, a note card, a scrap of paper, open a word document…something. Take 5-10 minutes or longer and cast a vision for the next 4 weeks. 

How will you end this semester? Spring 2012.